thepopenale - Down, Baby (AudioSexedAlbum)

Discussion in 'Our Music' started by thepopenale, Oct 1, 2013.

  1. thepopenale

    thepopenale Noisemaker

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    No waaay am I uploading a .wav unless I need to, at the end of submissions or whatever. Takes far too long for me! Sorry.

    Anyway according to rule #4 this shouldnt be a dealbreaker:
    Code:
    4. Your track will be nicely reviewed by members who will recommend improvements and give you the go ahead.
    This starts loud, mind your ears.
    This is one of my favourite selfmade tracks :dancing:

    Enjoy and leave some good critical responses. Cheers.
    For those of you with ADD, dont give up listening early. Face-melter awaits later in the track!

    http://soundcloud.com/thepopenale/down-baby-draft-one
     
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  3. thisis theend

    thisis theend Noisemaker

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    Hey Paus.
    I like this track. I get kind of a NIN vibe. Some really angry lyrics would go great with this.
    Since I'm a sucker for hooks and melodies I'm probly gonna say this about every contribution, but I really feel like some melody / solo part would be a cool thing to stick in there somewhere, just to make it a bit more interesting and fun to listen to several times.

    Really dig the chopped vocals and I love the break @ 1,50 and when you change things up by doubling the beat.

    I suppose you want a really dirty sound on some parts here, but to me it sounds as if some of the bass and disty stuff is just a bit too loud, like those parts get crushed in an unnecessary way. Would be good to get some second opinions on that.
     
  4. thepopenale

    thepopenale Noisemaker

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    I cant disagree with anything you said! My solo skills are pretty limited so I avoid one just because it would probably be the same lead line (basically) I used in my other tracks, and it just wouldnt sit well. Practise, practise, practise I guess.

    I recently slated someone for crushing the master with compression :wow: My masters not got ridiculous compression but its really hot/input gain. The doubletime section is very dirty (track has tag of 'nasty'), that was my aim. Its difficult to step away and listen unbiased so you could be right. Its probably O.T.T.!

    The bass is Monomate synth if anyones interested: http://tweakbench.com/monomate I LOVE all these plugins, so simple and raw.

    Thanks very much for listening and commenting, I appreciate any input thats more constructive than 'Cool track, bro'. :rofl:

    I agree, maybe people dont wanna be nasty, pardon the pun hohoooooooooo!
     
  5. thisis theend

    thisis theend Noisemaker

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    Paus

    Yeah that's why I wrote some parts may be too loud cause it didn't sound to me as if you had squashed them with compression. But this can sometimes depend on the listener's gear, that's why it's always good to get checking from different sources. C'mon AudioSex, give us some feedback :guitarhero:

    And that extra something I'm looking for doesn't have to be a solo or melody, it can be just some kind of hook. Like 2 or 3 notes arranged in some cool rhythmic structure, or bouncing in a pan pattern… something with a bit of edge on top of everything else that kinda grabs a random listener.
    When you check a track like The Robots by Kraftwerk for example, you see how something like four very simple notes at the end of a vocal line can make a huge difference.
    But again, this isn't really critique, it's just some personal opinions and ideas I'm throwing out here.

    That tweakbench stuff looks really cool. Too bad it's only for windows (wanna insert 'sad violin player' smiley here)
     
  6. ( . ) ( . )

    ( . ) ( . ) Audiosexual

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    your percussion needs more work and needs to have better emphasis. The Bass is too loud, but not full enough, it is distorted and dirty, but there is no emphasis in the sound. The Claps are weak and need more processing, the toms are waaaay too spread out.

    I think the writing also needs quite a bit of work. The beginning is way too immediate and the overall arrangment needs a sense of pace and timing.

    Honestly, I feel as though your sound is too distorted and it makes it feel like there is alot going on with very little emphasis. And the build-up and breakdowns don't seem to be working very well. Not too sure about the elements you are using...to me they aren't working very well.

    I just don't quite understand what's going on in the track... :dunno:

    It's just an honest opinion and my opinion...please don't feel bad about it. Maybe others will like it, but I'm just really unsure... :(
     
  7. swing

    swing Newbie

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    Well I´m not the most electronic listener you´ll find here but maybe an 'outer' (subjective) comment helps.
    - I immediately felt your dirty sense in the track. It´s clear that it was what you were chasing but maybe it needs more contrast or focus in a few selected sounds to be reeeeaaally trashed and others dirty, but with more control. I think you could emphasize the beat with some crushed breathing-gated cymbals and get a more aggresive vibe just with a kick/snare/claps and nothing else. Your chopped voice working well with your main beat should be the 'catchy' things here.

    Some reference, just to be clearer: http://grooveshark.com/s/The+Line+Begins+To+Blur/2Cg3W7?src=5

    - The 'bridge' at 0.44 needs it´s own quieter character. I find interesting the sparkly bits sounds but the low melody with the similar phrase could be more interesting or less intrusive sounding. I don´t know how to express it well, but maybe more blank space and more attention to small details could work.

    - A low pitched non chopped female voice (like The Knife) could be nicer for creating a weird verse so your choruses could stand out with the main chopped melody you developed, just and idea.

    - For me the concepts behind song could be clearer and more direct if it results shorter and with more care and work in these three moments: the main 'reef-chorus' with a really crushed beat + the chopped voice and bass // quieter-tamed verses with less drums and bass and your bit modulated details (for contrast and interest) // your crazy double beat at the end melting faces by surprise.

    I know all this is subjective, but that´s what is reviewing about. Cheers.
     
  8. thisis theend

    thisis theend Noisemaker

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    and I was afraid I was being too subjective :)

    I respectfully disagree with these points, boss.
    I actually like the way the track kickstarts in your face. If you wanna be nasty, no need to beat around the bush.
    And I think the break was great stuff, well constructed with a cool freaky vibe.
    Music… go figure :grooves:

    But I guess there's always room for improvement when it comes to a track's elements and arrangement, and that's what makes the whole process so much fun (or frustrating, depending on your mindset and the deadline).
    And I won't argue about the mixing points, some rework to be done there.
     
  9. swing

    swing Newbie

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    LOL.. Well, I couldn´t say anything useful about technical-objective spots because I´m still learning in that area.
    For me subjective impressions work sometimes. I also like to show my music to people who don´t listen related genres at all.
    Sometimes is revealing what they feel about your weird aesthetic taste in sound.
    So Paus, take just what makes sense to you. :thumbsup: I'm focused more in production approachs in my 'review' because that´s where I´m more experienced I think, and sometimes other musician friends ask me a lot about what I listen in their work. I´m not judging from my taste, just considering and highlinghting strong/stand up moments and respectfully suggesting ways to enhance them.
     
  10. thisis theend

    thisis theend Noisemaker

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    carl

    I was in no way critizising the comments you guys made. I think both you and the boss make a lot of valid points.
    I was just smiling about the feelings I had about my own comments :mates:
     
  11. ( . ) ( . )

    ( . ) ( . ) Audiosexual

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    good one :wink:

    I think I'll leave it to the rest for the reviews on this one...it's a little tough for me. Not really good with the distorted sound :D
     
  12. thepopenale

    thepopenale Noisemaker

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    A lot to take on board! Ill give it another proper listen on monitors and headphones in a day or so. Like I said, I find it difficult to stand back and hear a track with an open mind and fresh ears! I get excited and usually jump the gun.

    This falls under the genre of 'neck that Jameson' for me, thats probably why I love it at the moment. Just a track to freak to, not gonna be to everyones taste. Id find it difficult to say good things about a Trance track, regardless of how good a Trance track it is, simply because its not my thaaang.

    Again thanks for the honesty and helpful pointers everyone, no room for B.S. in this business :wink:
    Ill be back with a fresh approach!
     
  13. ( . ) ( . )

    ( . ) ( . ) Audiosexual

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    Thanks for the effort :)

    I'm actually reviewing from a production and engineering perspective, part of the rules is for the reviewer to try his/her best to focus more on the quality rather than taste :wink:

    If you can perfect this track and give it your best and your albums worth, then it will definately be on the album.

    Part of this track making excercise isn't JUST to make a track for the album, it's to improve your ability and push your own limits *yes*

    I'm actually going to mention that in the update thread I'm preparing soon. Stay tuned, we have a alot of issues to adress... *yes*
     
  14. swing

    swing Newbie

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    Of course, you don´t have to apologize or explain anything at all man! :wink:
    My whole point (for Paus) is just that sometimes in so up front tracks you have to push/higlight selected (just a few) things to get the vibe, not work only into get more exciting stuff coming out of your speakers. I think the track sounds a little messy because there´s not so much 'distance' (in level, textures, color) between the instruments into the mix, that´s all.
    Everything else I said were a few things that appeared in my mind during a few listenings, and I think you have enough magic there Paus to get a really catchy song. I know that reviewing is not about subjective taste, so I wanted to be clear that my perspective is not as accurate as others here more based in technical aspects. Less is more sometimes. Choose the most central elements and drive them like hell to cut/kick some faces and leave a solid but more distant background sitting back to support the madness whitout interfering.
     
  15. d.Gogoi

    d.Gogoi Newbie

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    i didn't like it..maybe shez not my type..anywayz maybe i'd like ur nxt one *yes*
     
  16. The Prophet

    The Prophet Newbie

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    Definitely my favourite of the Audiosexed submissions so far.. so dirty and rad!

    :wink:
     
  17. Someone

    Someone Noisemaker

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    Dirty :grooves:

    Your style have something to it... :wink: nothing more to say *yes*
     
  18. Dickbrain

    Dickbrain Newbie

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    this sounds fucking awesome :wink:
     
  19. thepopenale

    thepopenale Noisemaker

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    I knew there were some aficionados of filth about. Thanks :wink:

    Ive kept the original as is for not, duplicated the project and am tweaking it into the 'PG' mix.

    Ill A/B both closer to submission date and make a decision on selling out soon :rofl:

    Cheers!

    p.s. Flux is a similar kinda nasty for those who wanna scroll down my Soundcloud. Dub-Hop with some staaaaaaaank :bleh:
     
  20. Catalyst

    Catalyst Audiosexual

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    Your track is down.
     
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