Caution: This is yet another topic written by me to whine about stuff... If you're unable to deal with this sensitive shit, don't read it. But I know there are some AudioSexers who always find some nice words to this kind of stuff


A while back I postet this topic:
http://audiosex.pro/index.php?/topic/13429-life-hit-hard/page__p__90557__fromsearch__1#entry90557

One sentence summed up my work-situation pretty good:
"I hate my job, even though I tried so hard finding something meaningful and nice..."

And it got worse. The whole point of an "apprenticeship" in germany is to teach young people a job. You should learn and work. I only worked. And the work didn't even have to do much with what I should have learned or wanted to learn. They didn't care, we young idiots were there to being used as cheap workers. Very cheap, as cheap as it's legally possible. And it got more and more monotonic. The last month I basicly got only two different tasks, everyday... Not learning anything. That is just depressing as hell.
I was on sick leave a few days, diagnosis: stress and dissatisfaction.

So I started a plan, finding another apprenticeship/job for the next year, and then leave that place. Althought I gotta tell you, going there in the morning and thinking I have to survive one more year in this hell... Some days I struggled.

That whole job is based in the creative sector, working with media etc... Of course I didnt get a chance to be very creative. But still there is a need for the company to provide software, like the adobe creative suite. Its just the standard. Well we seemingly didnt had a legit version in the first place, because as soon as some of us clicked "yes, of course update to the newest version" the software stated "this trial version will expire in 30 days". All right, what would a company do? Of course not just buying the software, no...
I got asked to buy a license with my studend ID card I got from school, so that all of us could use the license. Then I thought "wait a moment, that doesnt seem right. Better read the license terms", and those pretty much state that it is not allowed to share a studend license with anybody else. You can use it at work, and at home. You cant let anybody else use it. I said to my chef I can not let you buy that license under my name and than do something illegal with it. I'll get in trouble... I mean it's not like using a warez version, it's a bit more like creating or sharing one...
Anyways, my chef didnt like it, and because others agreed to let him do that shit under their names these colleges suddenly hat a bigger valuable than me. I didnt do what he wanted, how could I speak against the king.
It's not the only reason I got fired, I guess... But defiently the main reason why he chose to fire me over others. He would have fired somebody of us new workers anyway, jugding from what I have heard from "older" coworkers thats his style. Bring three in, fire one or two. Easy peasy. Just like that, who gives a crap.
After I told that my teacher at school he was surprised of the situation, at first. He asked for the name of the company, and than it got clear to him. He wasnt surprised anymore, it was more like a situation he had know before. I asked him if the company is known in the school, and he nodded in a way that told me they know whats going on there...
I later talked with something like a "union" or "supervision-company" for companys who offer apprenticeships. Once again, the case wasnt unknown, the worker there was only surprised nothing changed since her last talk with the company. Even worse, she found out more negative details.


Why the fuck did I write all this down? Because it felt good, and maybe some can relate or share experiences, if they made it to this point. Still not at the end, lets get to the second part of my whinering


Now I am fired. Understandable next step is to search for a new apprenticeship in another company. There are chances. If you're not german you will properly not understand how thes whole thing works and wont be able to understand my situation. Lets just say is crappy, but there are chances...
Still, I'm not sure if I want to. I tried to get near to my dream job, and the whole thing turned out to be a big fucking mess for me.
Good thing about this is that I moved out from home, and I like living alone. I dont wanna loose that, who wanna move back to their parents after being indipendant (well, party indipendant... Low payments dont cover normal costs...).
My living situation is not that bad at all, dont wanna get old or raise a family there, but its good for a young guy.
What I found hard to manage: getting everything done after a full-time day (8 hours + 1 hour brake = 9 hours away). For me that's not having much free time. I spend most of my time at work, than sleeping. Free time is filled with preparing for work, buying food and shit, etc... Little amount of the day is free time, and often enough its late in the day and you cant do shit anymore. That sucks, and I dont get it. Whats desirable about that? Its no fun... Not at all. It feels like life is on hold for five days, than its saturday and you finaly have some time to live... And most of the time you are to stressed out to do relativly demanding and time consuming things like making music. Its just not in there anymore, and slowly you're dreams fade away, and you transform in another soulless, meaningless human body, walking around on this planet, living a life with no purpose whatsoever.
Its no fun, and I dont get it. Whats the fucking deal if you aren't happy? It doesnt make any sense. Living just to live? Okay maybe thats enough for all those who drink till they pass out just to drink till they pass out, for those who listen to lady gaga crap (sorry, no offence) just because others do that, who visit the same fucking place in the same predesigned holydays like all those others... But for me that is hell, and I dont see any point in drinking till I pass out, listening to the same shit as everybody else because I seem to be to stupid to explore something else, and I dont see any point in going where all the others go because Im unable to find my own destinations... I dont see the fucking point!

What is he trying to tell you? I dont wanna have a full-time job, I dont see how I could be happy with throwing the only precoius thing the planet gives us away: time. I wanna have time, not loose it.
Why are part time jobs unrespected, not well paid, for mainly women only (no joke, by far the most part-time jobs in germany belong to women...).

I dont see the fucking point in doing something that keeps my life and dreams on hold, and all I do is which to get out of there. It doesnt make any sense...


So yeah, long text. If you managed to read all of it, feel free to write whatever comes to you mind.

 

Hi Someone,
I read the other post, too. Highest respect to bring it on the table. I`m struggling with a shit payed and time consuming job like you, in this fucking retarded, nazishit, soulless robotmaker country.
Right now I`m at work or should i say detention, try to get back tonight if I`m not too tired than.

 

Hello Someone,
as I already explained in your other thread, I know the country as well although I'm not German.
Strangely nearly everybody in Germany is lamenting about missing (spare)time. I think that's related
to the history of a country and also to the actual rhythm of life of a country. The faster it is - the
less is the amount of time that people feel to have at their own disposal. That's also related to the
technological progress of a country.

For artists, creators, authors or inventors the “urge“ of having enough free time is obvious!
Who wants to be stuck in situations that suck precious time and energy? On the other hand you
have to live (survive) in a way or another. It makes no sense to starve or suffer privations,
only because you haven't found success or the right channels yet in your "dream-job".
What if your "dream-job" doesn't really exist? Then try to create one slowly that matches it.
Try to find a simple job that doesn't require too much energies, which gives you the chance
to accumulate some resources (cash), these savings could later permit you to work free.

Remember that “normal“ people that go on holidays (always the same spots!) are probably stuck
in situations stated above since years and years. Once you become aware that you don't want to
be like them, decide to have your own view of the world, destinations and lifestyle.
That will make you immune - in long terms - to their interferences.
Including those that pretend to know so good what's good or not for you.

Good luck mate!

 

You have many options in life, especially when you're young.
If you haven't found what you really like, keep on searching, and don't give up until you've found it.
There is no paradise on earth, but many good compromises, so to say.

Some people have to try wildly different things in order to find out what they really want.

 

Hey Someone,I have lived in Switzerland for the last bunch of years so am familiar with the apprenticship way of doing things and the importance of following through and getting that piece of paper. I would hope being fired from this company will not leave a black mark on your record as the school and everyone else seems to know how shitty the company is. I guess the important thing is finding something else to do and finishing up there, probably really working hard to find something rather sooner than later as this will show future empoyers that you are self motivated and were telling the truth about your terrible experience with Shitheads GmbH. Another good reason is is to keep the Euros flowing so that you can live away from home. Why don't you write some music about your prediciment as it would be therapudic and something interesting to look back on in the years to come when you are prosperous and older, a kind of snapshot of your past. I wish you the best of luck and please check in with us in the future to let us know how you have solved your dilemma.

 

Greetings from America, where the daily grind and its soul-murdering and time-devouring aspects aren't so different from in Germany. I am reading your post on the 17th anniversary of losing the apartment where for once in my life (in my mid-30s), I had felt I had really had, and made, a home. I had been fired from a job and could not get hired again in time to keep rent paid. I was forced to choose between living on the street or being a refugee in another part of the country, where everything was (and has been, for the past 17 years) so different enough that I've been unable to regain my footing and my identity as an adult. For the past 17 years, I've not even been able to earn enough to save enough money to relocate to a more amenable environment.

In other words: I was perma-fucked, for life, because I'd told a supervisor, "Don't yell at me." By that point in life, I had lost all ability to take abuse from anyone. I don't know how it is in Germany, but in America, it is expected of an adult to allow oneself to be infantilized, abused and intimidated routinely in order to keep one's job. That in addition to the fact that if you don't talk about sports or care about what's on TV, brag about the things you own, or chit-chat about the other superficial crap that everyone else at work does, they'll start shit with you or find some excuse to fire you.

Meanwhile, when something like what happened to me occurs, one is told to "pull yourself up by your own bootstraps" and get it goin' on like a real man. The myth (that is, the illusion) of the "rugged individualism" of Americans comes from the fact that ruthless competition is at the root of our society, and we reserve the right to not give a shit about anyone else. We'll display this grand collective gesture of an "outpouring of compassion and support" for a faceless, remote mass of refugees due to some natural disaster, but when a victim of individual circumstance is standing before us, we blame him for his own problem and tell him to pull himself up by his bootstraps (translation: "Go fuck yourself").

It took me four-and-a-half years to no longer wake up and cry, or wake-up crying, about what had happened to me and having to live with it, and for the past 17 years I have faced the further humiliation (thanks to being flung so irrevocably far out of context) of inconsistent and insufficient employment, and of not being able to lead a proper adult life. I'm not talking about anything extravagant; I don't want a fancy car or a big house, I just want to be able to live in a decent apartment and not worry about how I'm going to pay rent on it, conduct a proper social life, be taken seriously as an adult, save money, take a vacation trip every once in a while (in America, there are no laws requiring employers to grant vacation time/pay, just like in China and in no other "developed" nation). Now I am middle-aged – so, maybe next life?

If you do find a way to pursue your dreams without having to eat shit at a full-time job, just make sure that you have a means of being able to keep your rent paid otherwise. It helps to have caring relatives to provide moral and financial support (I have not) when truly necessary. You are right about the whole scenario at the workplace, in the corporate world. It's almost designed to kill-off people's individuality and destroy their dreams in life. If one can't at least conviningly pretend to resemble the others and to enjoy one's enslavement, one hasn't a snowball's chance in Hell of getting-by in that realm.

 

man!, you guys are really depressing me I'm working full time in Asbestos decontamination/destruction,
we get paid to be braindead and get paid to ignore safety rules as much as possible,
I allready dropped my dreams, cause I need to take care for my daughter and girlfriend.

I'm 24 years old, I feel your pain....

 

no matter where we live, as i said above, all we ask us to do, is shut our mouth, obey, pay taxes, work , pay taxes, work, pay taxes, die.
next.

 

I say fuck 'em, you're out of there now, no longer can they hold you back from doing what you want to do, the world is your oyster once again, now you answer to no-one, well, apart from your girlfriend/wife maybe '0)

I wouldn't worry about it, enjoy life while you still can, that's my theory anyway

 

Well said!

 

better no job than bo health...
When I have my problems I always think that the great major of humanity have more problems than me (Yes I made Social Service too) and that cry I am loosing time instead doing something just because I believe that we are only here to learn something spiritual not to achieve sucesses...

 

The only bad thing i can see in your situation is that you feel like whining about it. Try not to feel like that. You may see it like a healthy confirmation that you are not insane.
It is really easy to see that if you don't choose conformity externally and internally people especially in companies will make you ,without you being aware of it, misinterpret your sanity by labeling yourself as..not worthy or whatever you name it.

Things and situations are not that serious really, you choose not driven by fear and that's a good thing.
Just try to be aware


- Boss comes in and says: You are out of here young man. You are the only person in this office who is not suffering from a stress related disease. You don't belong here.
- Thank you Sir!

 

we are all different...
one problem... 10 different guys.... there will be 10 different feelings... from "i don't give a fuck".. to "Dear Lord, it's the END"

 

hey man... always remember... you could have been born under "3rd world" circumstances... that could be worse (although, I imagine there are "very simple" people, living "very simple" lives that are perfectly happy and content)... which brings me to my next point... the older I get, the more I realize that this existence is ALL in our minds... and its up to our minds to get us through it... much of the physical hardships I go through are NOTHING compared to the psychological hardships.

There are people that live in grass huts, with no running water... and the idea of working in any office environment would be like a vacation... I'm not underestimating your grief, however, I am providing something to relate or compare to... and hopefully that will help.


hang in there mate, if this is the worst it gets, then you might just be ok... it's all "up" from here

 

You know what, Someone, many writers/songwriters/playwrights have experienced your hardships and put their stories into songs, plays, movies etc. There's enough material in this thread to write several! Think about it, and best of luck.

 

man you frickn' NAILED IT...

especially the bit about the fuckn sports... I HATE team sports man... so boring and lame for me... I tried, when growing-up to be all excited because some random male athlete caught a football and ran passed the goal-line.. but no matter how hard I try, I can find absolutely nothing interesting or intrinsically enjoyable about that... and in this country, and in the business world these days, its all about "networking" and pretending to give-a-shit about this acquaintance and that acuaintance etc... and just the simple ability to "talk sports" would be of great value to me... but oh well... I am myself and that's it...

 

even when people are young, 18,16,15yo, we should never tolerate that a little sob treat us like shit. no way. at least, me, i can't stand it. no human being has the right to humiliate me or whoever, with no reason (and even with a reason....). specially when we are young, and are learning the profession, and tend to be more sensitive, and often are afraid to answer back, and have to swallow all insults, and shut his mouth. NO WAY.

 

Hey Someone,

I was one of those who answered your original post and told you to just try and get through the "hard" times, as I did whilst serving my 3 year carpentry apprenticeship.

Seems you weren`t serving an apprenticeship from your description, you were basically just SERVING!

Don`t get too despondent. You are still young. You WANT to learn and get on in life and they are important aspects of you that will get noticed.

Hard as it is, you gotta keep plugging away. Don`t give up like so many other young peeps who see nothing but weed, benefits and social housing as their future!

Be blessed my friend and keep on fighting the GOOD fight.

 

to me you are a lazy guy that dont like to work.

 

Err... I'm confused, because I like to go to my work! I don't get paid well but it's a good job (IT related) and my co-workers + my boss are good friends to me - not just because I'm a girl - seriously! I work hard (10h+) but it feels good to achieve something (e.g. coding a cool app or webpage/-app). My spare time could be larger, but I feel happy. I have some *real* friends and a hobby (music ;)) where I make a bit of extra money.
I barely pay my bills, but do I need so much more to live good? I don't need every year the latest smartphone shit (remember: IT related job!), not the hippest clothes and no other luxury shit they told us to buy in TV. Best hint in life: Ban your TV. Don't waste too much time in that fucking asshole of time consumpting brainwash. If you feel happy, just watch exactly what you want like a movie or a series, but that's it. Just do what you want in life, not what others tell you to do, or how to be.

And please explain me:
Why am *I* happy with my life - just having little money, a full time++ job,... and good friends - and you're not?