just for the money...but thats offtopic and complex ...but at least let me say you have romantic sight on ppls lifechoices . ...and yes there are also craftsman or how you call it english that have great life and joy for their work but ..............

 

Re. CD player in the mind...
When I was young I called it a tape recorder in my mind but yes I absolutely do although it doesn't function nearly as accurately as it did when I was younger. I could put an album on the turntable with the sound off, not look at it, and listen to it in my brain in real time and finish at the exact time that the record player did. I also use(d) it for finding pitch by listening to a relative pitch from something I know.

 

Oh and anybody that tells a clinically depressed person to "just get over it" is a complete and utter irredeemable asshole not worth one iota of respect or compassion.

 

it may sound dumb and abgedroschen but most ppl forgot or never knew who they are but you must find out and know who you really are .
straight facts
but nowadays ..................

 

First, I'm sorry you are in pain. I must say that your post is interesting to many of us though. I'm sure there are many here that come from different cultures - for me, I found my passion for music as a child in Australia, and found my career for it in Hollywood in the 1990s. I never felt the art left me, but I did feel that the industry did. After the world of Napster and my entire income went away as the recording studios I worked in were shuttered or sold off for the real estate value, it felt that the end was nigh.

But all through that, the art still existed. What seemed to scream out to me was the artists were swindled by some illusion in culture of what success was, and that their quest towards that end never seemed to result in fulfillment. In about 2012, one of my friends & clients committed suicide over this. He was the lead singer in a super successful band in the 1990s that I was honored to have recorded, and after he realized that time moved on, but he didn't find a new calling or adapt, he ended it for himself and his family prematurely. When something like that happens, it makes you come face to face with why we are doing what we do, and whether it is worth it all.

I can say for me, it is. After I realized I had to choose between living in a world that put some financial value on art, or the alternative currency of fame, I started to realize how misguided this whole thing was and that creating something you are personally truly proud of is priority one. If you never listened to other people's music ever again, and only looked into your self and found your own message and exposed it, I would say the world would be a much more interesting place. But we quest to be like some other artist, rather than to be our true self. And we measure our progress down this wrong road in either fame or fortune.

I left the western world and moved to Mexico, and returned to my calling - the calling that I had as a child to create innovative and original music by whatever means were available to me. It didn't need to be a computer - it could be banging on a drum. It could be a guitar, a piano, etc. And the greatest thing that turned it all around for me was to stop trying to be a solo act and realize that music is a social communication. If you spend time creating and rehearsing with others, you might find that their enthusiasm and approach motivates your own. Being stuck in a room, in a box, like a jail cell, is almost the antithesis of music as an art form.

Give it a try. Put down the computer and go out with other musicians & artists and feed off each other for a while. You might find it returns your passion. And don't measure your success in money or fame. Measure it in happiness. If you find yourself in an economic challenging situation where you are forced to sell your soul for money, the easy answer is to leave that situation entirely and find a place where you truly can find your path out of the maze you probably find yourself in now.

 

Shoehorning yourself into generic established genre isn't really a path for finding your identity as an artist, it's more like trying to find business route. Like you are painter and instead of drawing whatever you want to provoke and send message, you end up drawing caricatures of people for money, two different paths really. Same here, who cares about genre, listeners, just make music you have in yourself, that's your real identity.

 

this is it. every person that creates anything, let alone music, should be doing so from a place of authenticity rooted in self. Nobody should be trying to be like anybody else. I was going to avoid this thread because i thought the premise was a little odd and ridiculous and didnt want to judge because i simply dont understand how you can not have direction when you know yourself. but clearly people simply just dont. and thats ok. its part of the journey. But if you're going to create, you do so for self to express a thing and then give it to the world and let it belong to the world. what comes of it, comes of it.

 

It is true of so many facets of life these days. We've become a species of duplication - rather than have the courage to go out and find who we really are, we opt for traversing a path that everyone else has followed before, didn't end well, etc. but that's ok. Kids go to university even though they have no idea what they want to study or be. They spend $100K+ for an education, going into debt they can't pay off until the day they die, and yet they look back and wonder why they did that. They still don't know who they are, or what career they want to pursue. We mould ourselves in the image of others, rather than have the courage to go out in the world and face struggle so that the true sense of self is revealed. Parents are scared for their kids, and just elect to sell them down the road of safety, rather than support what really makes someone come of age and understand their own personal truth.

It reflects in career, culture, art, invention, and resilience. Maybe start with the personal journey, and the rest of it starts to fall into place.

 

word

 

An a artist is an artist it has nothing to do with the income.

Firts of all stop questioning yourself as this is where things start to go wrong, i speak from experience.You are in a spot that all of us been or will be many many times in our life ,this is unavoidable so give it a rest ,take a break as if you want to be inspired you must do other things in your life not just listening to music.Read books, watch movies have a normal life dont restricet yourself, the mind needs all kind of "food".I always start with a blank template and just start hitting notes over a beat,sooner or later after many failed attemts i will get one that is worth it, there is no magic trick here,do stuff every day and you will get results.Get a hardware groovebox if you dont have allready,hands on control is much better than clicking with a mouse all day and its fun.One last thing stop collecting vsts and jumping daws,learn one inside out and use a few vsts you know well

 

yep. you get it bro. Society is built to create worker bees. Those that traverse the winding roads and get beaten up on the beaten path to bet on self end up becoming the trusted voices that speak with authenticity. Nina Simone once said that it was an artist's duty to reflect the time. In order to be that artist, you have to understand your own voice and why it matters. cant do that trying to be like somebody else. you get it my man.

 

brother (or sister), i hear you. and can relate. im in almost the exact position u are. music is my passion and all i want to do all the time is make it but i make no income from it and work a 9-5 w/ a family and all that that brings. i even made a similar post awhile back ab having very similar feelings/struggles with identity as a "artist" and why even do it knowing that all likelihood is that very very few will ever even hear anything i make. there were some great responses that i found helpful there from this community. i'll link it. it's not exactly ur predicament but it is somewhat parallel i think. idk. u may find some useful answers there like i did.

https://audiosex.pro/threads/really-struggling-with-the-low-chance-of-success.72095/#post-725770

as far as identity i think it really just comes down to how "seriously" ur trying to make this ur job/career. like some others have said, yes some artists are able to play around w/ genre (a good example would be post malone right now. he's making pop country but popped off in rap/hip hop) but u really have to be well established before you can start doing that with a loyal fanbase. u cant drop ur first demo or album with a rap track, a country track, a house banger, and a midwest emo mathrock track and expect anything but confusion. if ur really going for it i think u do have to pick a lane and establish a sound that's yours.

but if ur like me or at least at the point i've gotten to after ab 5 yrs of making my own music by myself in my little barn behind my house knowing it'll likely always just be a hobby no matter how seriously i take it unfortunately, then you may soon come to the conclusion i have recently. which is that when ur doing it pretty much for your own fulfillment/love/fun/watever, u can make whatever the F**K u want lol. kindof a "it's hard to disappoint ur fans with ur new musical direction when u have no fans" kinda thing ... i've kindof embraced it. plus creatively it just feels great to not care and just see what comes out when u sit down at ur daw w/ ur guitar (or keys or whatever).

here's 3 tracks i've made in the last year (not trying to self promote, i won't be offended if no one listens). i clearly have no f**kin' clue what i'm setting out to make 9 out of 10 times based on these songs lol. it's just me doing everything so take the mix/masters for what they are but i could never try to put these on an album together. and i could easily convince myself that 2 out of the 3 of them were a massive waste of time and energy bc of that. and sometimes i do start feeling that way. but i'm glad i made all 3 bc i like them. so it makes it alittle easier to drop that mindset.

https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/eqpv...ey=0u7y9lee9h5c1s5h28d7sl72w&st=dehyzom6&dl=0

https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/hbpr...ey=2ngvvuuggw3au9w4encolaal6&st=xguexy9f&dl=0

https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/xi7r...ey=nzl7hqiz852s9uc5dkh1yxlxw&st=cn1fga29&dl=0

 

any artistic crisis can be solved by making more art
the best art I've made is when I've forced myself to make art every day, even if 95% of it is terrible I'll eventually end up with the understanding I need to make something good
stop using the criteria you want to use to define what you make and just make

 

man, tbh i don't get you specific situation;
are you having second thoughts in relation to RnB? i'd make a decision and not look back.
if you want something more "tangible" you could make a tag (21), or specific patch (dj mustard) to put in your every song

 

@danielederossi

If you don't make money with music, if you don't have any obligations etc., why shold you worry about it?

1. You are not an "artist". May be you was in the past. Now you are not. It has gone. Try something else.

2. May be you need take a break. Rethink what you've done, look at it in a different perspective. OK, let it be. One day you'll gain clarity.

Any crysis is a step further. Any one. Something has ended, now it's time to make a step. But what exactly has ended? And what exactly the step you should make? These are The Questions.

And we may not hurry up as we already are late. We always are late.

 

Last edited: Jul 18, 2024

You have to be enthusiastic in any creative endeavour. if you aren't feeling it don't do it. Come back when you are feeling inspired. Eddie Hearn's podcast is called 'No passion, no point'. I think that especially applies to making music.

 

I don't have/had an “identity crisis” as a musician, but pretty much all other psychological and physical crises...
The most important thing was to beat alcohol, that was 13 years ago now, and it has lasted.
In my case, chronic depression and social phobias can be kept “reasonably” under control with psychotropic drugs.
Sometimes it goes better, sometimes worse.
I personally think that psychological problems such as anxiety, listlessness, sadness, burnout etc. influence each other and cannot really be “cured” permanently.