Mental illness will take you away from making music but any kind of treatment that works will try to get you to start making music again.

So, try to keep making music.

 

idk if its harder....maybe when i was a teen i thought that way. as ive gotten older, it seems like everyones got their own shit to deal with, im not special because i have depression, life isnt easy

and im extremely fortunate in a lot of ways. im wealthy and get to do what i love for a living; my life isnt perfect but i cant say its harder than others because i have depression, im just presented with different challenges than some: but we all have our own challenges and struggles in life, its not easy for anyone, even if it seems like it from the outside

 

Four years later :

 

I found out years afterward, the guy that taught me music theory (such as I know) killed himself after I stopped being his pupil. Turned out I was his only pupil, he was my age at the time like 21 or so. but he was parapeligic in a wheel chair and life just got to him. The only reason I quit was I didnt have a piano then and translating to guitar wasn't working so well for either of us..

so thats when I began to realize people who appear normal maybe having a harder time of things then one would think.

later several family members also ended their lives. It certainly gives one perspective. My brother shot himself after getting a milkshake, my sister said "that milkshake couldn't have been that bad." - it helps to laugh when things like this happen. there is no rhyme or reason.
everybody breaks sometime, most of us just bounce back, but some folks just can't. Its tragic, but its fair more common than we realize.

I've always felt the gift of perspective, of being able to see around and above the current problem that I've got my nose pressed up against, is the greatest gift. to realize, this too shall pass. and in the end we're all dead so no need to hurry the grim reaper, he will arrive in his own time.

 

as one ages, one learns to walk around open rabbit holes, as rarely do they contain actual rabbits and usually the juice aint worth the squeeze, still curiousity must be maintained or why continue the journey? Its as the Greeks spoke of, "the golden mean" the balance, between boredom and madness, between too much and too little, in the middle one finds much to be joyful of and one can walk to the edge and enjoy the view without having to attempt to leap the chasm.

btw philosopher is slang for bachelor...

we are more than the sum of our parts but less than the sum of our hopes. Desire is to be tempered, but life is pointless without it.
when you see desire slip away, chase it.

 

that's why our mom's told us to get our shit together.
but yeah biome is an amazing gift or curse..

 

life does give one an appreciation for the blues regardless of age, skin colour, or gender. we all have our own cross to bear and much of life is learning to recognize it and then shoulder our burdens as best we can. I think part of the problem of the modern world is we have mass communication which lets us peer in to everyone's life and it leads to thinking everyone else has it made. When in fact we are all a single breath away from suffocation, to paraphrase Pavlov.

Life is this fragile thing a gorilla glass mirror we can pound on relentlessly until it shatters and is impossible to make whole again. we learn to live with the millions of reflections the broken mirror provides. It is only the reflections that make a life well lived. we may not always like what we see, but we will learn much if we just look and contemplate what we see and what it means.

we are all born, we live our separate paths and then we die, and we are all together again wherever we were before we began this journey. There is a reason we are in the world together, as we will never understand the world, so we will never understand our lives, but we must still contemplate our lives for not every question is answered, but still every answer has a question.

 

.

 

Last edited: May 31, 2024

being different isn't a crime. In order not to suffer and move on from a very difficult start, I decided to use psychedelics to treat myself and maintain my creativity. I also use amphetamines (not meth, just European speed amphetamines) as a psychostimulant and it really works, except that it's illegal and no industry like pharmaceuticals wants to invest in effective molecules, since their aim is to get patients to go back to their doctor and pharmacist every month. I've got my own medicines,

 

this guy is better than EMINEM

 

My loved ones, but not only them, are the main source of my latent but mild depression. They have been trying to make me like them since I was born. All my friends and associates suffer from depression and/or mental illness. Some of them are in treatment, while others have never been diagnosed or treated. Many, most, of the people I have met in my life have very serious mental health problems, even though they lead seemingly healthy lives. Many politicians, if not all, have very serious mental health problems. Some more, some less. The most serious and ill always turn out to be in leadership positions and are always highly praised and loved by the masses of voters. I can say with all certainty that my experience of humanity on this planet is and has been absolutely disappointing, so much so that I have never been able to integrate myself, ending up being judged by the community in which I live as an individual with clear and multiple mental problems.

 

Reading and asking about mental diseases and conditions on the net is a surefire way to self-diagnose yourself with something.

I mean, it's great that people can share about their experiences, but let's admit... we know fuck-all about this except our own condition, whatever that might be, so please take care of yourself.

 

One very important thing that many don't understand is that "the mental" state is not simply something that exists freely and independently, floating around somewhere according to the will and character of the person. Instead, it is primarily produced by the body, and while it's possible to influence and alter those processes by (psychological) interventions, there is always a certain degree to which a mental illness is actually a physiological illness (or an illness of the brain/body), albeit the degree to which this is the case differs among individuals.

 

So the life of people is hard because mental illness, or it is hard because many people don't talk about it ?

 

@Kate Middleton
The rich themselves don't get ill but make other people mentally ill with their wealth.
You should know this better than anyone else.
Think about the roots of mental diseases and see how many percent of these diseases are caused by the rich in other people, of course, if you are interested in the roots that I don't think so.

 

keep in mind, Normal people, are just people you don't know very well......

 

Danie, Keep in mind our Kate Middleton is not THE Kate Middleton, she's actually her cousin Samantha, but she doesn't want anyone to know, so please don't mention it to anyone, it will be our little secret. Also Samantha isn't nearly as wealthy as Lucky in Love Kate, who tripped over a crown prince... Samantha must make do on a tiny stipend of a few hundred thousand pounds per annum and whatever royalties she can wring from those plugins she's always trying to sell door to door in my neighborhood at least.
so in closing, yes the rich are a pain in the ass, and yes the poor are a pain in the ass and basically anybody who's not you is a pain in the ass. its just the way the world is. but it helps to be nice to the poor as there's a better chance they'll share something with you than the wealthy, but then again it might not be what you want to have shared, but you never know until you try. so buck up and all that, and get on with things..

ps. a pleasure having this little chat, lets get together next week and knock up another one? eh?

 

At first, I thought depression was just something I had to tough out, but it kept getting worse until I could barely function. Now I know how bad it is

 

I'm not entirely sure I've ever gotten grips with my own depression (the only one I'm somewhat of an expert with), but someone once said it pretty well: depression is not feeling down or blue, depression is your brain lying to you. The biggest problem is figuring out what the lies are and how turn down the volume on them. It's especially hard because they're my own thoughts. That means whenever an intrusive signal gets into my mental flow, it doesn't mean I'm necessarily thinking pretty fucking grim thoughts consciously. It means my broken brain is feeding those things.