Humility

Discussion in 'Lounge' started by DoubleTake, May 1, 2024.

  1. DoubleTake

    DoubleTake Audiosexual

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    Humility is easy to forget when one is trying to highlight something.
    But if we make sweeping generalizations or state opinions as if they are facts, it can give an impression of arrogance, or ignorance, or both at the same time.

    Well perhaps I am overly sensitive about this topic...
    Yes I think that's true.
    So, I went over my thoughts and made a post about it.
    So, I hope you know I am not picking on YOU..
    The main reason for my sensitivity is the realization of my OWN tendencies years ago...having to admit my own unintentional arrogance in having judged the world and life. I never thought I could have passed judgment like that... but the mind WILL HAVE ITS JUDGMENTS, no matter what one does.

    Ignorance can promote arrogance and vice-versa so the each can act as a feedback mechanism for the other. When I say "ignorance" I mean not stupidity, but either lack of knowledge / understanding, or ignoring what we actually know to be true , whether due to constraints of time or to avoid complicating things or due to not caring about what is TRUE.

    It SEEMS TO BE a MAJOR problem with so many people of making statements as if they are fact, and it seems to project an arrogance.
    I often wonder if it is a sister problem of the 'never been told "no" problem that seems to be so rampant these days.

    Perhaps they have been able to bully others with opinion and not be called out...
    Perhaps they are more skilled with rhetoric than their associates, or their TEACHERS.
    Well, whatever the reason, it seems to me that a lot of people make generalizations and statements without any disclaimer that would indicate they realize some limit of their knowledge or any admission that it is their opinion or perception.

    Of COURSE we MUST ignore or minimize or leave out most everything to make a short coherent statement,
    but if we are a BIT humble we may realize that nearly every CONCLUSION is very incomplete, almost to the point of being a deception. Every generalization is technic ally a lie in this way, because if we think about it, we KNOW it is only showing one aspect of a complex situation, yet we promote it as if it is "HOW THINGS ARE" .

    So what are we to do?
    Spend half a post making statements of conditions and caveats?
    No, but simply adding a conditional phrase or word here and there can go a long way to avoiding seeming arrogance.
    In this post you might notice I highlighted some of my own words of phrases that indicate this is all how things seem to me, and not necessarily how things ARE.

    Of course sometimes is NOT any lack of consideration of how complex reality IS, but instead truly is pure arrogance. :yes:
    I won't say which is the case for my post here :bow:
     
    Last edited: May 1, 2024
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  3. aschnt

    aschnt Platinum Record

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    Must agree with most of what's been said. This hits home. I do very often feel concerned by this unintentional arrogance too as i do mostly present things, talk, about my own and personal perspective about things. Even if it's often about subjects i spent a long long time thinking about to, in the end as you said, realize there is no solution or conclusion because, again, everything always is about perspectives... It feels like i don't express myself correctly most of the time.

    But anyway, please know that i never intentionally wanted to express any feelings inducing arrogance, or ignorance, although most likely failed in both ! And i'm not very good with words either.. So as far as i'm concerned, i'll try my best to improve this ! And if i fail again, if anyone feels off put by what i say or the way i say it, i'd gladly accept your slap on the cheek. I don't care about being molested in "public", probably others can benefit from it too !

    Thank you for this rant (and lesson) brother :) !
     
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  4. jhagen

    jhagen Platinum Record

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    To put it simply, stay away from people can't accept criticism or different opinions. For most of them humility is the weak point to attack and destroy the opponent in a war engaged against anything can weaken their pathogenic beliefs.
     
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  5. mino45

    mino45 Kapellmeister

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    If you ask for my opinion, I might tell you what I think. Are you going to like what I have to say? Maybe – maybe not, but that is beside the point. If you only ask me because you want me to tell you what you want to hear, then better not ask at all.
    That said, if you are a stranger, chances are high that I won't give my opinion, unless it is something positive or uplifting or at least something that I believe will genuinely help you. If you are a friend however, I will tell you what I believe you need to hear, even if it is difficult, or I know that it will not be what you want to hear at all.
     
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  6. The King

    The King Guest

    People fall into two main categories. Those have a fighting spirit and are usually recruited by armies or work in economic sectors that do not show mercy to customers. And the other group are those who don't have much to do with the surrounding environment and usually stay away from others. The second category, because they always feel guilty, they don't involve themselves in different things because they are always worried that their morale will be hurt. If you belong to the second category, you have no choice but to choose humility. These people usually don't talk much and because of the fear of making mistakes and damaging their psyche, they always live in a secluded corner.

    77038n.jpg
     
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  7. SineWave

    SineWave Audiosexual

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    A wise man once said: "It all depends on the circumstances... in my humble opinion." :)
    And "Everything is shades of grey, not black or white.":wink:

    Nice post, man (OP). Enjoyed reading it. Some food for thought, it occurred to me whilst reading it - sometimes you have to be an authoritative figure, and in that case using too many "perhaps' and maybes" can undermine your intentions instead of promoting them. Like politicians, teachers, instructors, coaches, layers... you better come across as really sure of what you're saying to succeed in persuading your peers, to be successful.

    Socialising with people is like politics. And I personally hate that.
     
    Last edited: May 1, 2024
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  8. guns and gold

    guns and gold Kapellmeister

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    Yes it does seem the internet has delivered to us (in a remarkably short time frame), the death knell of critical thinking, and with it our general ability to empathize with others AND recognize consequences of decisions made (a la there is no punch to the face for calling someone a dickhead online). If you let it, these can be deeply troubling concerns re: the future of the race. The fact that we even entertain peoples inability to ADMIT they don't know something, or cave to their 'cause' out of social-born fears is such a deep degree of infantilization that you do have to wonder.. is there a way out of this? Or does it simply continue to spiral, potentially leading to let's say 'advanced tribalism', where if you don't agree we throw rocks at you.
     
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  9. Garamondo Furbish

    Garamondo Furbish Audiosexual

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    life is short, death is long, try not to overthink things. A change of scenery will do a body good even if its just a trip to the Tavern....
     
  10. BaSsDuDe

    BaSsDuDe Guest

    Possibly the easiest way to avoid the ego taking over from the brain is to simply say nothing at all. I'd love to say I can do this all of the time, but that would be a total lie. However, when anyone has spent 40 years or more honing a craft and someone posts information stating it as if they knew it well, and you know it is either so far from the truth, or just completely and utterly wrong, it is difficult to say it is wrong without seeming like a know-all. If anyone has lived something their entire life, they have learned the singularly most important thing, which is what not to do in their discipline.

    The written word like here on this forum, is a perfect example that anyone can take an innocent comment and turn it into something that was never intended. Realistically, communication is still one of the most important skills for anything. Directly related to this is the ability to relay any kind of information in a manner that is easily understood. Sometimes, if something is completely wrong, it can be nearly impossible to say something critical without it being seen as any one of a myriad of negatives. Whether this is seen as pontification, being sanctimonious, egotistical, surreptitious, arrogant or any list of negatives, depends on context.

    There is an old saying that if a person knows they can do something, then they have no reason to prove that to anyone other than themselves. Speaking only for myself, when I see something that is complete disinformation and plain wrong, I fail sometimes by saying something, when I probably should have said nothing at all. This said, if you know it will spread the wrong information to a LOT of people who will think it is right, it is a coin-flip not to say something. What it boils down to is keeping the ego in check, and that writes in text much easier than it is to execute it.
     
  11. Grape Ape

    Grape Ape Audiosexual

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  12. mino45

    mino45 Kapellmeister

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    At least online it is rather simple. You can even write everything that you think you have to say, as long as you don't click send. A lot of the time I realize that there is no need to actually send it. Writing the comment was more something I did to clarify my thoughts or a reaction that was triggered by something that was said. If this happens, I will simply delete it again, because there is no need anymore to confront the other person or to cause a lengthy interaction that probably will not yield a positive result.

    There are however situations where not speaking up is not an option. If faced with injustice, repression, bullying, etc. we should always speak up because these things can only happen if the majority stays silent.
     
  13. The King

    The King Guest

    Talking is a good thing. It makes many of the mistakes that we made in the minds during many years of life to be revealed and a solution is thought for them.
    I know people who themselves, their generations, and their fathers and grandfathers thought wrongly, but because they refused to speak, they continued this mistake for more than 100 years and have hidden their mistakes behind the quick movement of their fingers. This can happen in anything, but if there is no dialogue, mistakes will always be piled on top of each other, and these mistakes will lead to the creation of empty professions.
    Humility is good if it is to help people and not create an atmosphere of conflict between people, but if it is for not seeing other people at your level, it is not called humility, but sunken-disdainfulness and possibility of its waking up at any moment exists.
     
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