Good day everyone.
As the title says, I have a ul.to coupon valid for 1 month, to give away.

As I usually do, I will choose the best joke around.
You should not copy and paste jokes from the internet, you should not paste links of funny articles, youtube videos, or meme images of the internet.

Single line jokes are more likely to win.
Please be brief, funny and most important: witty

See you in a few days.

 

Beamz by Flo. No really...

 

the girl from "True Blood" opened a restaurant and called it "Sookie's steak house"

 

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walked into a single line.

 

Funny jokes huh.
How about martin garrix.

 

Charles, Prince Of Wales, was in love with Camilla Parker Bowles... hahahah..ha..ha...err.. Sorry. That's not funny at all.

 

A man walks into a bar surrounded by beautiful women. He says to the bartender " Let me get a round for the entire bar! ". The bartender spends a half hour setting up drinks for everyone and just as he sets up the last shot the bar doors fly open and a tiny man jumps up on the bar, kicks all the glasses off the bar and then runs out. The bartender shakes his head stunned. The man pays for the drinks and says to the bartender " Another round on me ". After another hour of setting up drinks just as he his finishing up the last shot the door flies open again. The little man jumps onto the bar, Knocks every single glass off and runs out of the bar. The man says to the bartender " Sorry about that, one more round ". This time the bartender says " Hold on just a minute before I spend all night setting up drinks again I wanna know what the hell is going on here. Who is this tiny man? ". The man says to the bartender " Well I found a magic lamp yesterday and when I rubbed it a genie appeared and said he would grant me three wishes. I wished for a hundred beautiful blondes, all the money in the world and a twelve inch dick and that was him."

 

Guy walks into a bar with a frog growing out of his forehead… Bartender walks up to him dumbfounded and asks " my god, how did that happen?"
The frog looks sternly back and states "it started as a zit on my ass and kept growing…"

 

whats the only bad thing about having sex with a underage girl? ...... watching her break down on the witness stand.

 

A guy, who was standing outside at the job center, watched a job advisor returning to his desk from a morning coffee break.
He asked what is the difference btw to be on the dole or being a system mole?
Not that much, answered the public servant.

 

I asked a sexy Chinese girl for her number.

-She replied, Sex Sex Sex,Free Sex tonight.

I said, Wow!

Then her friend said, She means 6663629

True Story *yes*

 

Thanks everyone,
although most of the good jokes were similarly funny I had to choose xHitoKiri,

See you the next time!