I finally made something, heres the link to the song:



please give feedback on it! (made in 1 day)[/MEDIA]

 

Last edited: Feb 17, 2022

early ulrich schnauss a like, the piano is a bit kitchy,

it doesnt move me enough to like it but towards the end you enter some arpeggio that takes the song where it should go before leaving us too early

the story telling needs some rewriting

good stuff

keep at it

 

I don't know what this song is trying to convey, but it really stressed me out ...the song seems generally unstructured

don't take it personally, but we should be honest

 

Last edited: Jan 10, 2022

Wdym by the piano being kitchy?

also yeah, I can see what you mean by it needs some story rewriting, maybe I did leave too early with the arp.

Thx

 

Can you elaborate like what do you mean?

 

2:27 the piano is one element too much while carrying too little weight, ye the arp is the cool thing, let it enter earlier and remove the piano

start with the arp and then layer in the other elements

take a boards of canada listen

 

Ok, thanks,
whats a board of canada?

 

I would completely take off the drum part (kick and snare are completely unsuitable) for the song ...
try a soft drum & base kit for the rhythm part and a nice sub bass to give it a bit of depth

Watch here ,

 

there's no melody, no chord structure. bin it i'd say !

 

Bro, what daw do you use? Sounds good to me and i'd love to do my version of your song!

 

Holding down one key on keyboard is not making a song

 

Congrats on doing your first track and posting it. You are learning a lot. Use any criticism constructively and do not be deterred.

Just remember, the more music you make, the more you learn, the more you learn the better the track, and that should be the goal.

Never forget, you can't please all the people all the time, and music is used for many different projects. Background music for video presentation may not have or need a melody line. Keep up the good work and stay in that creative flow.

This is how some of the pros do it. Create an abundance of tracks and pick the top 10 to put on the CD.
Please create and post more tracks and keep up the good work. I'm looking forward to more.

 

the thing about instrumental music, it should be a story, a journey or some sort. It's a listening experience, a build up to something the listener will be patiently waiting for while they enjoying/feeling the full experience. Yours doesn't have any of it. I'm not familiar with the type of music you are making, but I listened to band that plays instrumental music, something like this one below, pay attention to how it carries the listener to a journey, slowly building up, with carefully planned structure, like it is trying to tell you a story, delicately playing with space and dynamics, and most importantly not painful to listen to even this band is LOUD as fuck playing live. It's an old favourite, watched them live few times. I could be wrong, but hope it gives you an idea.

 

Congrats on completing a track. It's more than most do.

Curious. What soft synths were you using?

My only critique is the ending just chops off..need to edit that.

 

Thanks for all of your feedback. @Burninstar I will definitely take your advice.

@Deceptive I will check out that video, thanks!

@Stevie Dude That's actually really useful info, most of the time when I listen to music, I never fully realize they are taking me through a story, also the video is unavailable, I cannot access it, please tell me the name of the song?

@memex how does what DAW I use matter in making music? You can do the same things in any DAW, I use REAPER tho.

@vuldegger @studio5599 what?

@Tele_Vision what synth are you talking about?

Sorry, too lazy to quote everything and make this the longest reply, so I just pinged the names!

 

@birdboi
I wanted to ask what daw you use to propose a collaboration or to make a remix of your song so that you can send me the project

 

oh ok I see, I mean IG you can remix it? Idk how music collaborations work

 

So my own feedback.. I actually thought it was going to be intolerable, with how some of the feedback here was haha But it isn't bad at all. Sure, it lacks a good melody, but man.. I can tell you I've heard wayyyy worse music out there from people who've put out several songs. So keep at it. This is good for your first song. As you continue working on music, you'll start to figure out things a bit better. I have my doubts many electronic artists get it all right on their early/first attempts. As someone said earlier, it's important to be honest though... don't take anything too harshly. Most people are just trying to help you write better music. Your music has some ways to go, but it has POTENTIAL. You can make good music with a lot of learning/practice.

So, to my feedback...

My biggest beef is that the mix feels a bit rough, especially later in the song. Many elements in the song are a bit too harsh/loud and hurt my ears a bit once many parts are playing at once. It takes quite a lot of practice to get a good mix down though, in electronic music. For me, a song with this kind of vibe should probably be a lot softer sounding. The harshness becomes more emphasized when listen on headphones. I'm using some high quality ones, but also tried on some other headphones too.

It can be pretty tempting to just get a whole lot of different melodies/instruments going at once, and that'll add to the mixing chaos. It gets pretty hard to give them their own space. Sometimes less is more. In the case of this song, I think some elements are a bit overbearing, the piano, for one. Maybe the boomy kick isn't helping too.. I'm not too sure. Perhaps one thing you can try is see how the piano sounds when played overtop the few parts used in the breakdown. Or perhaps you'll just have to tone down some of the other background elements playing when the piano plays, and also tone down the piano a bit.

So... are you selling your songs tomorrow? No, you're not, but this is a starting point for writing songs other people jump at listening to. Listen carefully to the songs that really move you, and try and understand all the parts that make up that song - the chord progressions, how the bass interacts with everything, how the artist keeps things interesting with movement/pattern changes/fx usage (ex. risers), how the melody is "built" (for lack of a better word), learn how to tame the harsh sounding instruments, etc.

Anyways, keep learning, and keep making music. Thanks for sharing the song!

 

Not that bad. I was expecting worse, but it does have movement. There are a lot of comments that should probably be prefaced by 'if I were writing that song I would have done XXXXXX,' however then it would be a different song.

Keep going, plenty of people have spent a lot more time doing things and have done less. If you enjoy it and it speaks to you then it was worth doing.

 

Agree with the lacking of a melody. There is a 4 chord structure though that keeps repeating itself.