Any addvise or comments appreciated. The vocals are from vocal libraries, so I have limited possibilites to work with and improve the lyrics and song-melody.

 

The line "don't need closure" at 2:20+ is late. Whether or not intentionally, it is off-putting to me.
When your synth with a leading melody comes in, it sounds to me like that should be the chourus.
Sorry I can't be of more help.

 

There seems to be a disconnection of elements in this track. One one extreme are the acoustic and on the other the synthetic with the vocalist unsure of her place in the song. Normally I would applaud the resistance to drop a four on the floor kick in, but I really felt the lack of it and a bouncing bass line left me wanting. I quite liked it despite the vocalist doing the "I'm singing without opening my jaws" thing.

 

Thanks for the input. Actually helped a lot.

Here is a new version, new structure. Taking a rest from this song now.

 

One question how many instruments did you play on this?

 

Sonically and structurally a little confusing.
The bass is booming and like Lenny said feels disconnected to the other instruments and vocal. An unnecessary snare roll build into an anti-climatic verse. And probably worth downloading Soothe just to tame those wind instruments. I would advise investing in some better speakers to listen back to.

 

Would be nice to have access to the stems themselves.
I firmly believe that anyone who works in mixing audio tracks does not see audio the same in the way as someone who never listens to the tracks individually.

The magic of the mix is gone as access to the individual tracks allows for a different mix.

Sounds really good just the timing of some items needs to be aligned.

 

@JTSD Thanks for sharing your project. Good idea but bad execution. There are several aspects of this song that I feel need to be redone. First, structurally it fails as an attention grabber. To put it bluntly, the intro sucks because there is none. It is like a ship lost at sea not knowing where it is heading. To me it seems like you used a reference track and that lead you down the wrong path structurally. A one minute monotonous wannabe intro is not going to cut it. Again, a one minute monotonous wannabe intro is not going to cut it. Secondly, at 00:59 the vocal track is out of sync. it is bothersome to hear it, more so when it something that can be easily fixed. Third, the "tension and release" is completely absent in this song. Finally, I am not going to comment of your mix because no matter what is done with this song mixing wise, there is not saving it unless the foundation is corrected. As a side note I would like to suggest that you do keep on working on THIS track instead of jumping into a new project. Load up the stems and led others here do their magic with the condition that they have to work solely with whatever is on the stems.

 

the elements are there just need more work
cut the intro in half
get a half proper vocalist
more contrast and at least somewhere where it peaks.
good luck