I'm stealing this idea from another place because it can be really entertaining especially if you leave out the "heard this one 1000x before" ones and stick to the ones that really might brighten other people's day or hold some deep insight into life, the universe and everything.

To prevent spamming and nonsense I suggest the following rules:
- only one quote per day
- every post must contain a quote (that includes commenting quotes)
- no political stuff (just funny, inspirational, wise..."noteworthy")
- ideally you can name the source...

I'll begin with this gem:
"Gunfire erupted from a window high above them, but it was only a bass player getting shot for playing the wrong riff three times in a row, and bass players are two a penny in Han Dold City."
- Douglas Adams, So long, and thanks for all the fish

 

"Give a man a fire and he’s warm for a day, but set fire to him and he’s warm for the rest of his life."

- Terry Pratchett, Jingo

 

“A gentleman is someone who can play the accordion, but doesn't.”

- Tom Waits

 

"Growing old is mandatory, growing up is optional."

- Walt Disney

 

"They couldn't hit an elephant at this distance"

The last words of General John Sedgwick.

(apocryphal, but more apposite, version:
"They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist...")

 

In my signature ;)

 

One of my ex's favourite sayings....

"Give a man a fish... and you feed him for a day....
Teach a man to fish... and you can get rid of him for a whole weekend!"

 

My signature, via my boy Bach.

 

" I'm gonna put a curse on you and all your kids will be born completely naked. "

Jimi Hendrix

 

From Twin Peaks, Season 3

Agent: I'm sorry ma'am, you can't smoke here.
Diane: It's a fucking morgue!

 

If sex is a pain in the arse, you're doing it wrong!


( I have no idea where it originated, but It's been a favourite since as far back as I can remember)

 

“This Snow Crash thing--is it a virus, a drug, or a religion?”

Juanita shrugs. “What's the difference?”


― Neal Stephenson, Snow Crash

 

" its a poor musician who blames his instrument "

 

Did I ever tell you what the definition of insanity is?

- Vaas Montenegro

 

Moustaches are not disgusting, it's what you do with them... - Craig Ferguson

 

Last edited by a moderator: Jul 19, 2017

- Rick and Morty

 

You're the burning heat of a bridal suite in use.
You're the breasts of Venus,
You're King Kong's penis,
You're self abuse.
You're an arch
In the Rome collection
You're the starch
In a groom's erection.

--Cole Porter (1934)

Is this noteworthy?

 

I think a lot of people get confused between loving the idea of making music and loving making music. - Rick Snoman

 

A lot of pop music is about stealing pocket money from children.

Ian Anderson

 

I have been reading Terry Goodkind's epic fantasy series "The Sword of Truth" recently, and each book reveals a "Wizard's Rule", or a magical principle that allows Wizards to be savvy manipulators of the world around them. Here are the rules from the first five books I have read so far...

Book 1 - Wizard's First Rule

"People are stupid; given proper motivation, almost anyone will believe almost anything. Because people are stupid, they will believe a lie because they want to believe it's true, or because they are afraid it might be true. People's heads are full of knowledge, facts, and beliefs, and most of it is false, yet they think it all true. People are stupid; they can only rarely tell the difference between a lie and the truth, and yet they are confident they can, and so are all the easier to fool."​

Book 2 - Stone of Tears

"The greatest harm can result from the best intentions."​

Book 3 - Blood of the Fold

"Passion rules reason."​

Book 4 - Temple of the Winds

"There is magic in sincere forgiveness, the magic to heal. In forgiveness you grant, but more so, in forgiveness you receive."​

Book 5 - Soul of the Fire

"Mind what people do, not only what they say, for deeds will betray a lie."​

I highly recommend these books to anyone who likes the epic fantasy genre!