3 different chord structure in the intro, all sounds out of tune. it just an ideanot a song. more like testing instruments. did you have any idea about a melody at all?

 

could probably be mixed better, low end, mids and highs are pretty "un"-crisp. but for a demo this is totally ok. most of all its quite interesting. its waaaay to short though, make the generic song structure and repost i would say

 

That really is a dreadful thing to have happen to you, but let me try and put a few things into perspective here.
If she had gone through with the pregnancy, your child will have been turned against you by her. She sounds like a dirty manipulating slut that would have made your life an ongoing misery, resulting in your early demise, hated by her AND your child.
You now have another chance to rebuild your life. Don't treat every woman by her standards. You just chose badly. There IS someone else out there for you who you will be far better off having children with.Someone who loves and cares whether you live or die. That said? what else have you lost? Possessions? Yes, I get that a lot of your creative work has been ripped from you, but you have your health. You have your mind, your brain. Instead of allowing yourself to be the victim here? turn what happened to your advantage. You can recreate the best of what you had. It will take time, but you will have learned a valuable lesson. Put it into your music.
People turn hurt towards their music ALL the time, and afterwards? they will tell you it was their finest creations. SO? learn from your mistakes and put your hurt into your music and this time next year you might be in a much better place with a whole new outlook on life.

Good luck fella.

 

Wow. Deep story man. So sorry you experienced all that. I can imagine how this is on you. Be strong my man. I really do feel for you. Play some bob marley. Everything is gonna be allright. But seriously, perhaps in this moment, LISTENING to music may be your best therapy. Step back from trying to make it. It will feel forced. Your heart isn't in that place right now. Listen to therapeutic songs. With time, that music you listen to will inspire you and move you to create the music your heart needs to heal. My condolensces for your unborn baby. Once again, stay strong.

 

Last edited: Aug 25, 2016

yea, i wanted to but her truck was full of "gatherings" items like tents and other camping items, so i had no other option, i did attempt to burry it somewhat under blankets before we got there, but apparently that didnt work...

 

n happen nn you for the perspective, it seems to be a difficult thing for humans to detach from situations and get a better perspective, esspecially if the situation happens to be an emotionally chatotic one. i appreciate yout perspective, i had not even had that those thoughts cross my mind. but you are most likey right. and yea, it almost feel bad saying this, but not completely, she was a dirty manipulating slut, i ended up paying for the window to her car. and before she decided that she was done using me she convienced me to take her back, just long enough for me to buy her new tires, set up a meeting with this guy i knew who had property and a nice little house on it, and pay for a myriad of other things that amounted to around 3000$ and seeing that in hindsight along with what you said makes me feel like my "picker" might be broken when it comes to women, either that or society has shaped most women into horrible creatures that live soley to gather as much material possions as possible, slong with a consciousness that is a mere shell when compared to what the human soul is capable of.

and you know what? i use to tll people all the time when i first started producing music and other art thst pains are what drives alot of artist to make beauty thst we enjoy, i guess being a crybaby and letting myself wallow inside my hurts had blinded me from th very things i use to use in w productive way, so thwnk you very much for thwt also, you guys are making me cry, making me pissed at myself, and making me want to turn all that into positives. ^_^
Honestly i have been pulling so far away from everyone that i wasnt even sure that sharing any part of anything with people would ever feel good again, but being as strange as fate seems to be i guess i found a group of nerds who actually give a shit sbout me, or at least my situstion. so thank y sll. even those i havnt personally adrssed.

 

Thank you :,).. i will spare you the details of my childhood, lets just say it was extremely dark and im suprised i survived. but i digress, through all those times when i was a child i had a cassette tape player, and for a few years when homeless i had only one tape. a Bob Marley tape, and it was so powerful to me that it was more than just an emotional sanctuary, it was something that i feel is hard to put into words, it was like inspiration for the days in the future that i hadnt yet seen, it kept me strong, i think ill put on some good ole Marley right now!

 

That's more than a little bit funny hehe.

 

Without reading anyone else's comment here are my impressions. You create an intriguing mystery at the beginning with that melody, reminiscent of artists such as Jens Buchert and Mars Lasar. Then I don't think the beats do anything for the track. They sound like a confused mashup of genres that only adds confusion for me, they get in the way for me too, and they make the track too repetitive and un-interesting. I would like to hear you develop the Ambient melody, that mystery, what are you feeling? What is that mysterious melody trying to communicate? Play with that. Good start but drop the beats, they're doing nothing for the track.

 

We all experience weird and sometimes terrible things in our life. That's why when we get older we see the world through much different eyes, we are the sum of all our experiences. When you are ready you will get passed this and you will be wiser and happier, it's ok to feel like shit that's normal.

My advice is to use your pain in your creativity, make hip opiate the story that brought you hear. You obviously need more parts to the song, it needs structure and tension release. But you have a good foundation.

 

Sorry but I had to increase the volume to finally wait your composition.
For this kind of music style, I will not speculate on the subject myself, because I know nothing. Anyway, good luck for the future.

 

I think it's because even though most of us haven't been in your exact situation, we at least have been at very low points in our lives, where all we needed was someone who doesn't judge, but will listen and make sense of what we are going through.
Just remember one thing. We aren't defined by what we have been through, we are however on our actions in the face of it. I'm not saying forgive her, but I am saying you should put a line under that part of your life, and make a conscious decision to rebuild it one step at a time. One minute, of one day at a time.
Doing that through music might help both your soul and your mind.

 

I rearranged the groove a little, asked Kate Winslet for some voice-over, enjoined some Zim Choir, added a little percussion, tuned up the eq a bit and wrote and sang a little 4 line one take vocal, more to follow up if there is any interest. If anybody wants to throw in any further, let me know and I can post the few stems.

https://www.dropbox.com/sh/a8bqsgindgtzpcb/AAB3y_9smtxTOQhsUGNV48pha?dl=0

 

feelin what u did.. very nice..

 

I am just following instinct here, but this seems in some way apropos to this thread in some roundabout magical logic.

 

well i guess i will post the pieces of it for everyone to play with it since i created it and all :P enjoy, please post what you create here so i can enjoy what you all create with it. the folder labeled rows is after i made my loops i put them into lauchpad and played them live while recording them, the rows go in sequential order with the (very short) song. all other pieces are present also. thank all of you for your support and input, since you all shared with me i feel its only fair to share with all of you.

HERE YA GO EVERYONE
Hip hOpiate ALL PARTS
https://audibleesoterica.box.com/s/slkvxw04du2mhnhuqtjth24hv6gqlttd

 

Last edited: Sep 4, 2016

i agree, with all the things i have been through in my life the only way i have been able to get through all of it on my own was to just learn from the situations and see what kind of materials i could make out of the wreckage to try and build myself stronger from it.

 

thank you, i feel that most likely my building frustrations in life coupled with depression is what halted my progress on it, and i posted it here to hopefully feel a sense of community and not mutiny like i experienced so much in the recent past.

 

i hadnt really thought of that as an option, but i id start it as pretty much an ambient track, its feeling is to me, what opiates feel like to other people, i personally only use substances for shamanic purposes, so i do understand how it did feel right with the beat, i should have kept it within my heart instead of trying to make it more palatable for others, which i did because i tend to feel like im a bit too abstruse for people lol so thank you much for your ear's observations.

 

a very abstract one, but i feel since i lack the knowledge of music theory that i couldnt get my ideas from my heart to track (or atleast that is my excuse i tell myself to avoid truly exploring my potential) i tend to be a perfectionist in most things, and i felt this was sub par completely, but i was more afraid to try and put a melody in and have it sound worse than it did, and when i played live for those few years all i learned from all the big Djs was looping pieces of other peoples tracks and what acid is th cleanest lol (not once did i see anyone with a synth on stage, but it was the desert most of the time so i could understand not wanting to ruin equiptment) my point being this is really the first thing ive actually attempted to create from scratch, im a rookie plain and simple