My new track....feedback required Triphop/Chillout

Discussion in 'Work in Process' started by Ceejay, Sep 5, 2019.

  1. Ceejay

    Ceejay Member

    Joined:
    Jul 2, 2019
    Messages:
    24
    Likes Received:
    10
    Hi Everybody..I'm a newbie here so be kind. I'm fairly new to music production I only started in Feb 2019 due to an operation, I decided to take up my time into a new direction so started using FL Studio 20 with various vst's & Nektar Impact LX25+ midi keyboard...as to date I have 5 other unfinished projects I have been working on(which I will post up here soon) which need rearrangement, FX, sweeps, risers & vocals as well as mixing & mastering. Feedback is imperative as i need to improve my new skills...Thank You for listening.

     
    Last edited: Sep 5, 2019
    • Like Like x 2
    • Love it! Love it! x 2
    • List
  2.  
  3. Thankful

    Thankful Rock Star

    Joined:
    Feb 14, 2014
    Messages:
    618
    Likes Received:
    343
    Pure, blissful listening, thank you for this. Your music and mine is heading in a very similar direction. I want to work with you.

    Want some criticism? OK. The female vocal is already very overused, done, boring, and placed in the wrong places IMHO. The beats totally kill the Chill, to me they sound awful, shame because it's a really good-feel track. If you have to have beats (and it doesn't actually need them) make them much more subtle, and the same flavour as the Chill vibe...then again Chill might have a totally different meaning to you. to me, Chill is relaxing and soothing, no beat to make you move to. If you have a beat, you are entraining the listener's brain to follow the beat.

    Do you have more like this? Please bring them.
     
  4. Ceejay

    Ceejay Member

    Joined:
    Jul 2, 2019
    Messages:
    24
    Likes Received:
    10
    Thanks for the reply Thankful, I appreciate your ears.. I was debating with myself actually to cut the high-end beats out & just keep the sub bass kick for rhythm i guess, my arrangement is what I have been battling with for these past 6 months its been doing my head in!..I suppose I'll get it eventually, The vocal is something to fill in the highs as it is a fairly mid to low based track...I have more W.I.P's on my SC if you care to take a listen!?
     
  5. Ceejay

    Ceejay Member

    Joined:
    Jul 2, 2019
    Messages:
    24
    Likes Received:
    10
    I have worked on the track a little more & felt the vocals weren't meshing so I have taken them out, also there was a whipbird sample which i felt got annoying so replaced that with a more subtle transition fx, I have also tweaked the drum a little & did a version without the drum for a more chilled version.
    So I have posted them on SC for you all to listen.
    Re-edit:


    Ambient version:
     
  6. KungPaoFist

    KungPaoFist Audiosexual

    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2017
    Messages:
    1,696
    Likes Received:
    973
    Location:
    CA
    Cool stuff, I really dig this vibe! The drum versions are great, I think if you beefed them up it could really heat this into some full on Chemical Brothers type direction. The beatless is really cool too and could stand on its own as a meditation piece or something. I actually like the vocals that you removed from the first mix and since its a 10minute track I think there is more then enough space to incorporate that as well. I checked out your SC page and really like that "Acid Drops" track. That again has a killer Crystal Method'ish vibe.

    For starting in Feb of this year you've got some smooth flavor friend. Thankful mentioned a collab and I'm not sure if you're up for it but I could totally hear some drum elements and such that could be added. I'm really swamped at the moment but for kicks if you're down let me know.

    Looking forward to hearing more of this stuff from you:wink:
     
  7. littlewierdo

    littlewierdo Kapellmeister

    Joined:
    Jan 7, 2019
    Messages:
    78
    Likes Received:
    50
    Ok, the beatless version is FAR better. I really dig this, what it needs now is some structure. Right around 2:20, you originally had high hat, snare, and bass drum, and I dont know if it was just the sample, but it was awful. The high sweep that was removed, also terrible, glad its gone.

    Instead of a drum set, use an egg shaker. Typically, its a plastic egg filled with beads that can be shaken, use this in lieu of those terrible high hat, snare, and bass drums you had at 2:20 and elsewhere. This will give a since if rhythm, which this desperately needs, without being too much, just a subtle shaker with 16th notes and accented on the downbeats.



    Next, write a melody. A pan flute over the top of this with ALOT of reverb and delay would be fantastic, and you can use a bottle breath effect in key places to really add ambiance (again, mucho delay and reverb). Even something like a glass harmonica might be interesting.





    This is going to be another bizarre choice, but a didgeridoo would give it an even more mysterious feel.



    Instead of a drum set, use tonal ethnic drums with some light compression.



    The vibe here is, almost a sense of mystery and wonder at the same time. If you can develop some structure to this,it would dramatically improve. The female vocal is ok by the way, just significantly less frequently than you originally used it, I would think maybe three times tops.

    Here is what I want you to try, this might help with what I was thinking about, put on your studio headphones and hit play, turn the monitor off. Imagine floating in space. Imagine the sense of awe and wonder. Imagine the feeling of being weightless. Imagine the kinds of objects you might see in space, comets, asteroids, planets, moons, stars, the entire milky way in front of you. Musically, what would that sound like?

    If space doesnt work, although I dont think it works quite as well because of the digital sound youve used, but its another direction you might take this if you feel this vibe more, put yourself under water. What would you see? Perhaps an endless expanse of blue ocean? Schools of fish? a whale making a leisurely trek through the Atlantic? A never ending coral reef?
     
  8. KungPaoFist

    KungPaoFist Audiosexual

    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2017
    Messages:
    1,696
    Likes Received:
    973
    Location:
    CA
    :shalom:

    For the B-side mix then imagine a comet slamming into an MPC60 and a few hardcore hip hop breaks fly out with an interdimensional being riding jockey rocking a backwards hat.
     
Loading...
Similar Threads - track feedback required Forum Date
Seeking Feedback for my Melodic Techno track "NOVA" Electronic Nov 8, 2023
Track Feedback Our Music Oct 26, 2023
I've just mastered a track and would welcome constructive feedback/thoughts Mixing and Mastering May 21, 2023
Melodic Techno Track Feedback Work in Process Mar 9, 2023
Deep house track, of course looking for feedback! Music Releases Jan 5, 2023
Loading...